Chapter 48: How to Become a Count with a Cup of Tea
In Greek mythology, there exists the 'Golden Apple.'
This highly coveted Golden Apple was desired by three goddesses, for possession of it would make one the most beautiful goddess of all.
Currently, in the Empire, Ascal was no different from this 'Golden Apple.'
And the question was, who would become the owner of this Golden Apple?
It was a hot topic among the Empire's nobles.
Naturally, the most mentioned was the Crown Prince. Now, with the emperor’s sycophants gone, there was no leader among the noble forces to check the Crown Prince’s solo run.
If the Crown Prince were to acquire Ascal as well, it would be as if a fine horse had grown wings.
"Oh! He has removed his badge. Everyone, look at that!"
Count Devar, who had secluded himself after losing his pet gem frog, akin to his alter ego, made a rare public appearance.
And as always, he began to narrate the situation.
The new minister started walking towards the side where the Crown Prince was.
"Ah... How can this be."
Viscount Seynan swallowed his saliva.
Was the Crown Prince going to win over Minister Debrue after all?
With the strengthening of imperial power, naturally, the nobles would become subservient.
Viscount Seynan missed the days when Duke Sebes was around. Those were the days when they could at least snub their noses a bit.
"Your Majesty, please accept my badge."
"No, he didn't give the badge to the Crown Prince. It was to the Emperor himself!"
"How can this be!"
"Perhaps he has gone mad... Ahem."
The nobles murmured among themselves.
Naturally, they couldn’t comprehend Ascal's maneuver. No matter how much he was the Emperor of the Empire, he was already senile. A dead power, so to speak.
In reality, the ruling power was in the hands of the Crown Prince.
But why then did Ascal offer his badge to the Emperor?
"Could it be!"
Viscount Seynan, unable to contain his excitement, raised his voice.
"We have overlooked the fact that he too has blue blood flowing in him!"
Blue blood.
A symbol of those who neither see the sun nor work.
Duke Sebes and Count Galtanar both pledged their loyalty to the Emperor, at least outwardly.
Thanks to this, under the guise of being loyalists to the Emperor, they were able to protect the interests of the nobles.
"Is he trying to become the leader of the new noble faction!"
"To think he had such ambition!"
"Ah! Ascal Debrue! Although merely a baron, you have touched the hearts of us blue bloods!"
The central nobles began to express their admiration. Of course, they were mistaken.
****
The longer the Emperor lived, the greater the chance Ascal would have to escape from the empire.
Hearing this prophecy, Ascal visited the witch again and sought a plan.
"Here is a tonic. It's very expensive, containing medical herbs. It used to be regularly presented to the Emperor, but due to unfortunate circumstances, it can no longer be sent."
Elenia and Duke Sebes had some sort of trade relationship. With Duke Sebes gone, the tonic could no longer be delivered to the Emperor.
They tried to send the tonic through another route, but it's said that the Emperor has declared he would no longer take the tonic. To her, it seemed he had lost the will to live.
Elenia picked up the bottle. The radiant liquid swirled inside.
"How can I be sure this isn't poison?"
"We have a whole box of tonic accumulated. If you wish, you could experiment elsewhere. Shall I take a hearty swig here and now?"
"I had a plan too. A precious fruit from Erindale. The last of its kind that I managed to find."
"This is... the fruit known as 'God's Fruit'... How did you get this!"
Elenia was astonished.
"With this fruit, wouldn't His Majesty the Emperor live a very long life?"
"There's a problem."
"What is it?"
"If someone without 'the soul of a warrior' consumes this fruit, they will explode and die on the spot."
"Is that true? That's troublesome."
The witch caressed a crystal ball.
"Swear over the crystal ball that it's the truth."
"Aren't those things fragile?"
"This crystal ball contains the relics left from my mother's remains."
"My apologies. The tonic looks heavy, so please send it by delivery."
The next night, Ascal felt a pang of guilt as little witches struggled to carry a large broom with a box of the tonic.
'But how do I give this tonic to the Emperor?'
Ascal began to ponder.
How to give the suspicious medicine from the witch to the Emperor...
What was the reason for giving it?
To prolong the Emperor's life.
Why prolong the Emperor's life?
To escape the Empire.
Then why would prolonging the Emperor's life increase the chances of escaping the Empire?
"…!"
****
Ascal had an epiphany.
He didn't need to go far; if the Emperor granted him permission to resign, there was no need to escape at all.
In the first place, such a suspicious tonic was never needed.
If he could just gain the Emperor's unconditional trust, he would naturally be able to leave the Empire!
Gulp.
"Seros!"
Just then, the gem frog Seros jumped up and licked the bottle cap smeared with the tonic.
After being confiscated from Count Devar, Seros was kept at home due to the unnecessarily complicated procedures for disposal. He was quite a companionable pet.
Crack.
Except for the fact that he pooped at the most random times.
"What's this color?"
But the color of Seros' poop was unusual. It was different from its usual color, emitting a faint, iridescent purple hue.
And it smelled oddly familiar, a rich scent Ascal had encountered before.
"…Luwak coffee!"
Ascal had a realization.
Instead of the witch's suspicious tonic, wouldn't it be perfectly normal to serve the Emperor a rare tea he had procured himself?
Moreover, since Seros, who was particular about his food, ate it without any trouble, it seemed that this wasn’t dangerous.
Indeed, as the witch had said, this was a real tonic.
After all, if coffee could be made from cat poop, why couldn't tea be made from the poop of a gem frog?
If the Emperor no longer consumed tonics, then tea was the solution!
Gaining the Emperor's unconditional trust would naturally allow him to leave the Empire!
****
From that day on, Ascal devoted himself to making tea from gem frog poop.
And it was a week after Ascal pledged his loyalty to the Emperor that he finally perfected the gem frog tea, after much trial and error.
"Your Majesty, it's cold today. Please wear something warm."
"Cough, thank you, Ascal. Cough. You're the only one who thinks of me. Cough."
"How can you say that, Your Majesty? All the citizens of the Empire are concerned about your royal health."
Confucianism.
What was its core value?
To respect one's superiors and treat elders with courtesy.
With Confucianism deeply ingrained in his soul from past life experiences, Ascal naturally treated the Emperor with utmost care.
The Emperor felt the sincerity in Ascal's actions.
As one ages, tears come more easily. The Emperor felt a twinge at the tip of his nose.
"Cough, you are truly a loyal subject."
"Since it's cold today, I've prepared a small tea party for Your Majesty. I hope it pleases you."
"If it's prepared by you, cough, how could it not be delightful?"
Finally, the day had arrived.
After consulting with various tea experts of the Empire and tasting a myriad of fine teas, the 'Gem Frog Tea', which had even passed the discerning palate of Sushia, an expert in tea, was ready to be presented to the Emperor.
"Cough, everyone has been waiting for this old man, cough."
"Your Majesty!"
"Your Majesty!"
The nobles had already gathered in the palace's drawing room. Viscount Seynan, Baron Trinio, Count Rudeus, and others. These were central nobles who once enjoyed power but had become sidelined after the fall of the sycophants.
Initially, the Crown Prince was wary of their gatherings, but after realizing they only gathered to drink tea and chat, he left them mostly unattended.
It was truly a 'meeting of has-beens.' Everyone was baffled as to why Ascal was among them.
"Cough, everyone, please be seated. Today, Ascal has brought a new tea, cough."
"Ah! If Minister Debrue has brought the tea, I'm quite looking forward to it."
Ascal snapped his fingers confidently.
Then a servant entered, carrying a prepared tea set.
It was the finest Gem Frog Tea, ready to be enjoyed with the refreshments.
"Let's drink it before it gets cold."
The iridescent and beautiful purple tea was poured into each person's cup. Even for the nobles, who had seen and tasted all sorts of delicacies, this was a new experience.
"What is the name of this tea, Minister Debrue?"
"It's called 'Crystal Tea.'"
"Even the name is beautiful."
Baron Trinio, who enjoyed gourmet foods, was the first to savor the aroma of the tea. He was an unofficial connoisseur.
"...Excellent."
After deeply appreciating the tea's aroma, Baron Trinio took a sip.
"Such a rich flavor... Thanks to Minister Debrue, we are indulging in luxury today."
"Your Majesty, please try some."
"Cough, yes, I shall."
Finally, the Emperor took a sip of the Crystal Tea.
Ascal swallowed nervously. It was a tense moment.
"It's warm... warming. It makes me feel like living again."
It was a cup that warmed the cold, dry soul.
"How does it taste, Your Majesty?"
"Very good. Haha. The best tea I've ever had."
Continuously serving this Gem Frog Tea, infused with tonic, to the Emperor would noticeably improve his health...
Then, there would be no sudden demise due to health issues for the Emperor, and by continually gaining trust in this manner, Ascal could become the Empire's greatest confidant.
And then, he could feign illness to resign from his minister position.
It was a perfect plan.
"...Your Majesty! Your cough has stopped since a while ago."
"Really?"
"Minister Debrue! Could it be because of the tea you brought?"
This was unexpected.
Such a dramatic effect after just one cup?
The Emperor turned to look at Ascal.
Ascal looked back at the Emperor.
With the mood so favorable, he might be able to enact his pre-planned scheme.
To feign illness and resign.
Just as Ascal was preparing to fake a convincing cough.
"Ascal."
He was preempted.
"At your service."
"I find myself indebted to you again. There was a reward I intended to give you today, but even that seems insufficient."
"That reward, Your Majesty? Haha"
"Congratulations, Minister Debrue."
"...A reward, what do you mean?"
The Emperor tapped the desk a few times. Then, as if on cue, everyone kneeled on one knee and paid their respects.
"Though my state is humble, I can still offer you a small token of gratitude."
"...Wait. Your, Your Majesty."
Ascal stuttered, overwhelmed by the solemn atmosphere.
"Kneel, Ascal Debrue."
"Your... Your Majesty!!!"
"No need to be moved. Rather, this is somewhat overdue."
Eventually, Ascal knelt down, only to see the Emperor placing a sword on his shoulder.
"Ascal, in recognition of your unwavering loyalty and your outstanding service to the Empire, I hereby bestow upon you the title of Count of Erindale."
The Emperor, in his heart, wished to give Ascal more prosperous lands, but his options were limited now that he had lost real power.
With a hint of regret, the Emperor said,
"This position comes with the responsibility of overseeing the land of Erindale and protecting its people. Do you swear to uphold this duty and faithfully serve the Empire?"
Ascal shed tears inwardly.
"...I swear."
Ascal Debrue, now Count Ascal Erindale, couldn't bring himself to resign at this moment.
The official investiture ceremony was held the next day to great fanfare.
