Chapter 32 – Dinner (End)

“Is there anyone you have a crush on?”

It was a cruel question to hear from a guy you like but can't confess because he already has a lover.

Luss, Vienna, and Lily were in the same situation. 

Even if they wanted to tell Starchis that they liked him, he already had a girlfriend, so telling him could become awkward or even make Starchis avoid them.

In the end, the three of them couldn't speak.

When no one answered right away, Starchis pointed to Lily in front of him. He did so to prevent the conversation from going back to Elza.

"Noona, do you have anyone you like?"

Upon hearing these words, Lily remembered a situation from a few weeks ago.

-"Lily Noona, do you like me?"

Her hand - resting on her thigh - tensed. She regretted not giving a proper answer at that time.

However, Lily was already tired of regret, so she responded somewhat indifferently this time.

"...No, I don't."

She had no intention of correcting her lie, nor did she have the intention to say that she liked someone.

Even if she thought as optimistically as she could and said she liked someone, Starchis would never imagine she was talking about him, especially when she had clearly denied him just a few days ago. Lilly didn’t want to take the risk in order to just provoke some jealousy without knowing what kind of price she would have to pay for it. So, Lily just passed the question without any fuss.

"Luss, what about you?"

"... You're asking everyone here?"

"What's wrong with that? Since we've brought up the topic anyway."

Luss glanced at Vienna and Lily, checking their reaction.

Luss wondered why wasn't anyone stopping him from asking such questions and consequently preventing them from telling lies like this. Didn’t their heart shatter on speaking such a lie?

Although Lily had already answered, Luss still wanted someone to help her out.

But as no one spoke, the atmosphere became ambiguous, and Luss had to force a word out.

"...Yes."

She finally spoke the deeply buried truth. She couldn't even meet Starchis's eyes.

"What? You do?"

Starchis was the most surprised.

He had always thought that he was Luss’ only male friend.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You didn't tell us either. Luss probably met someone secretly too."

Vienna replied instead.

Luss glared at her.

The person Luss said she liked was, of course, Starchis, but because of Vienna’s answer, it became the nuance that she liked someone other than Starchis.

Of course, if she was asked who he was specifically, she was going to be evasive, but still…

An unnecessary remark was added, making Starchis reach the wrong conclusion.

"...Really? Alright. I guess it might happen like that."

Starchis thought it was only in his imagination that he had such a sudden meeting, but it was strange that the same thing happened with even Luss, whom he had known for six years.

Well, if the same thing happened with Luss, wouldn't the vague lie now start appearing more realistic?

“What is he like?”

Starchis asked with a mouthful of food.

“Uh?”

“Tell me his name or something like that. I told you everything too.”

"Well...um, never mind. I don't want to say."

"Hey, Luss. You're being too secretive."

"I don't know."

“You won’t tell me even though it’s been a six-year-long friendship?”

“…”

Luss lowered her head, seemingly unwilling to say anything more, and focused on her food.

“Then just tell me why you like that person.”

“…”

Luss - who had lowered her head - glanced back at Starchis, her ears - hidden by her long black hair - turned red, unnoticed by anyone.

"...dependable."

She spoke in a small voice.

Starchis found her shy response fascinating. He looked at Vienna and Lily’s reaction, wondering if they noticed it,

They both seemed completely unfazed though.

Starchis wondered if he was the only one surprised.

He wanted to tease Luss, but seeing that no one else reacted, he decided not to.

"What about you, Vienna?"

He asked the last member.

Vienna shook her head with a "hmph" and turned it away.

Starchis took it as a refusal to answer.

"Everyone else already talked about it, but what about-"

“-I have. And better than you.” Vienna couldn't hold back her emotions and blurted out.

It was because she was mad at Starchis… and she also wanted to provoke jealousy. And as the question was cruel to her, she also wanted to say something rude to him too.

Lily, who had experienced firsthand how big the price of lying was, closed her eyes tightly.

Of course, it might be a lie that could pass off easily, but it wasn’t a good scene to gloat about even if a rival drowned in a mud swamp because of such a mistake.

"You have someone you like?"

“Yes. More dependable than you, more cool than you, and… Nicer than you. In fact… You’re no match.”

She answered like a rapid-fire cannon, but after blurting out those words, instead of satisfaction, Vienna was only left with an uneasy feeling.

Starchis wondered why she was acting like this.

"Suddenly, why are you comparing him with me, Vienna?"

Oddly, unlike what Vienna feared, Starchis asked in a frank tone. 

There was no malice. There was also no sense of discomfort or anything like that, but his tone was not like usual either.

If he had said something like "Vienna also had someone she liked," or "She's boasting about the person she likes by teasing me, how Vienna-like.", she would have felt completely relieved. But now, she was a little alarmed… but still angry.

"Well, there's no one else to compare him to."

"Then just say he’s cool, what's the big deal?"

Even though Starchis said it like he was complaining, he playfully nudged her with his elbow, making Vienna's mouth form a small smile.

Vienna felt like she was such a fool for smiling so easily even when she was so angry. 

She didn't know if it was because she had tasted only suffocating feelings for too long that even a little bit of breathing space could make her feel alive.

"Well, Lily Noona is the only one without someone then, right?"

"That's right."

"Shall I introduce you to someone?"

-Clink 

"Oh... it was a mistake."

Lily dropped her fork. Her hand suddenly lost its strength at Starchis' words.

It seemed that as she had tried to avoid lying earlier, another trial came her way.

In an instant, she buried her face in her hands under the table, trying to hide her sobbing face.

"Noona, don't use that. I'll bring a new one."

Starchis got up from his seat and went to the kitchen. Lily also sat back in her seat.

With him gone, all three of them relaxed their faces and showed negative emotions, which they had worked so hard to keep hidden until then.

And at the sound of Starchis' return, they calmly changed their expressions as if nothing had happened.

Only Vienna’s face looked a little awkward, but it didn’t matter because she was next to Starchis and was not facing him.

As he handed over the fork, Lily held his hand and made a light skinship.

"So, about the introduction-"

"-It's not necessary."

"Oh, really?"

He felt uneasy about her cold response and scratched his head.

“Why is Starchis trying to introduce me to someone though?”

Lily asked, not letting the conversation die down. There was some irritation in her tone.

In truth, Starchis had no reason to do so. It was just a suggestion that came to him as the conversation flowed, but he felt like he had to come up with a reason now that Lily directly asked him.

"It's nice to have someone special," he hurriedly said. And as he tried to explain further, somewhat sincere reasons came to mind.

"... I might sound serious all of a sudden, but we're going into the dungeon tomorrow, right? Of course, we're going to succeed, but just in case, it's good to make memories with someone you like."

"What does that mean?"

At Vienna’s words, Starchis explained further.

"Vienna, you have someone you like. I'm just saying to greet them, take a walk together, or even confess. What if you go to the dungeon tomorrow with regrets? Think about it… You still have time until lunch tomorrow."

The three women looked at Starchis in silence.

No one said anything, so he continued.

"From that perspective, Vienna and Luss have someone to do something with, but it seems like Lily Noona doesn't. So, I thought I'd introduce her to someone. It's not a big deal."

"Spending precious time with someone you like...?"

Luss glared at Starchis.

Shrugging his shoulders, Starchis replied as if it were obvious.

"Yeah, that's what I did too."

Starchis remembered fishing with his brother. 

The three of them had different thoughts though.

-Clink!

Beside him, Vienna put down her fork and knife.

There was still more than half of the meat left on her plate.

But she was covering her mouth with her hand for some reason.

"Vienna?"

She struggled as if she were going to vomit for a while, then swallowed what was in her mouth and said, "I don't want to eat anymore."

"Why all of a sudden? You were eating well," Starchis said, surprised.

"... I have no appetite." 

Starchis was taken aback. "What's wrong with you? Are you not feeling well? Are you lying to me?"

Vienna, who did not respond, glanced at him and said.

“…It’s because I’ve been eating for the whole day.”

But because Vienna reacted this way just after Starchis' words, Luss and Lily realized that somehow, Vienna also knew that Starchis and Elza had sex. 

Starchis also knew that Vienna was hiding something, but he could not figure out what it was. However, since Vienna’s physical condition seemed fine, he didn't bother to pry. 

‘Everyone has something they want to hide.’ 

If that thing could have interfered with the B-class mission, Vienna would have said so.

Just like that, the rest of the meal went on without Vienna.

***

After a while, almost all of the food on everyone’s plate - except for Vienna’s - was finished.

At first, Starchis was worried about how the dinner would proceed after Vienna stopped eating. Fortunately, after that, the atmosphere flowed smoothly as they began to talk about the past and various sweet memories they had created.

"I'll leave first," Vienna said, getting up. It was the end of the meal.

"Are you leaving, Vienna?"

"It's almost time for prayer."

Then, Vienna gave Starchis a meaningful look and lightly tugged at his clothes. She seemed to be asking him to go with her somewhere.

"Vienna, I told you before that I won't take you to Church anymore-"

"That's not it. I have something to say."

His heart raced a bit at her seemingly insignificant words. He was already worried that something was going on with her, so he feared even more imagining what she was going to say. Furthermore, based on her tugging on his clothes, it seemed like it was something she couldn't say here.

Starchis apologized to Luss and Lily and headed for the door.

"Take care, Vienna."

"See you tomorrow, Vienna."

Vienna slightly bowed her head and left the room with Starchis. 

After going through the first floor and out of the inn, they walked some more before Vienna stopped and looked back at Starchis.

Having dinner with him this evening, she had changed her mind.

It was precisely the moment when she put her fork and knife down.

Previously, she had tried not to acknowledge Starchis’s lover somehow, either in denial or in anger, but now she thought she should just let things flow a bit.

Reacting to everything was too stressful and exhausting, so she thought she would not even try to do so. 

What had been hardest for Vienna was the feeling of being deprived every time Starchis had a new experience with Elza. But now, she acknowledged that it was natural.

And she prepared herself to endure many more heartaches.

Vienna knew that she would never love anyone other than Starchis. And since she would love him for the rest of her life, she decided to quietly wait until he broke up with Elza. 

Maybe they would never break up. Even then, Vienna had decided to wait. She was accustomed to patience. After all, she was a saintess.

But still.

There was a reason why she had come out of the inn alone with Starchis even though she'd decided to wait.

It was because if she was going to wait for a long time after today, wouldn’t it be okay to leave good memories for the last time? 

‘It’s like one last big breath before diving into deep water.’

Vienna looked up at Starchis and pondered what she should say to achieve her goal. 

Starchis also waited patiently for her to speak first.

"....Starchis… that…"

“Tell me, Vienna.”

“Actually, I am scared.”

Vienna wasn't talking about the dungeon. She was afraid of how long she would have to wait for Starchis to break up with Elza, or what she would do if they didn't break up.

But Starchis took it as a fear of the dungeon. 

He thought it was possible since Vienna was quite delicate.

"So, Starchis. I have no right to wish and there's no reason to grant it, but could you do me one favor?"

"What is it?"

"It's nothing special. I'm just scared."

Then, taking a deep breath, she said,

"Hug me tightly... So tight that it breaks me."

Hundreds of questions and thousands of things to say swirled around in Starchis' mind, but he couldn't say anything.

How hard it must be…

He wondered how hard it must have been to say something like this.

And how earnestly she needed a hug that she even brought him to a place where they were alone. 

Starchis couldn’t come up with an excuse like he can’t do it because his girlfriend doesn't like it.

Because Elza was not real.

When he weighed sticking to a lie versus appeasing a struggling party member, the answer came easily.

Starchis opened his arms wide.

And as soon as he opened his arms, Vienna hugged him.

Starchis also held her tightly in his arms, thinking it was a cheap price if her fear went away with something like this.

And he thought his decision was even more correct when Vienna shed tears in his embrace.

Vienna prayed silently with tears in her eyes.

‘You need to break up quickly, Starchis. I’ll have a hard time waiting.’

****

After the two of them left, Luss and Lily had a conversation.

“What do you think Vienna wants to say, Luss?”

“I don’t know.”

Once Starchis was gone, the atmosphere sank even further.

"... Making choices is merciless. To end up like this because of one mistake."

Luss nodded in agreement with Lily's muttered words. She also thought the same.

"Did you see him trying to introduce me to someone?"

"I did."

Lily laughed bitterly. "Oh, Starchis. How happy you looked when you asked me to be someone else’s?"

Luss couldn’t answer.

Every word Lily said pierced her heart.

"Luss, I've made a decision."

"..?"

“I just… I’ll just wait for Starchis.”

"What?"

Lily looked at her.

"I'm not the only one thinking this. Vienna probably feels the same way too."

"W-what do you mean wait?"

"I'll wait until he breaks up with that woman, Elza. He's so happy with her. Is it right to ruin their relationship like that?"

Although her rival was taking a step back, Luss’ heart felt uncomfortable. 

She felt as if she would have to take a step back as well.

"I won't wait," Luss declared. But Lily just sighed and laughed.

Hearing her own laugh that sounded hopeless, Lily felt herself becoming more and more crazy.

"Even if you don't wait, what will you do?"

Lily got up from her seat and lay on Starchis' bed. 

His scent filled the air. She didn’t even think to hide it from Luss and took a deep breath.

"Will you confess your feelings? Will you seduce him with your body? Will you badmouth Elza? There's nothing you can do, is there?"

"..."

"I don't know if anything could be done right now. So, I'll just keep waiting, no matter how long it takes," Lily said, closing her eyes while still laying on the bed.

Meanwhile, Luss said again as if casting a spell on herself.

“I… I won’t give up.”

Lily looked at her with burning-red eyes and replied.

“Don’t misunderstand, Luss; I didn’t give up either. But just… I’m going to use my power later- at the right time... Right now… I’m a little tired.”

– – – End of Chapter – – –

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