Chapter 23

Vivian couldn't understand herself.

Even with the food prepared more meticulously than usual, she couldn't bring herself to touch it. Her hand froze mid-air, hesitating.

Of course, as always, she was far from having an appetite. In that regard, nothing had changed.

However, Vivian always understood that meals were essential.

That's why, in the past, even when she lacked appetite, she forced herself to push food into her mouth.

But today, even knowing that she couldn't move.

Anxiety that there might be poison mixed in again made her palms damp with sweat.

Last time, she was lucky.

But what about next time? Is there any guarantee she'd survive again?

She didn't have an overwhelming attachment to life, but that didn't mean she had none at all.

At least, she definitely didn't want to experience the dizziness and pain of being poisoned ever again.

"Haa..."

In the end, Vivian put down her spoon.

Today, she really didn't think she could continue eating.

Even now, she felt a strong revulsion—as if bugs were crawling in the food—and a nauseous feeling welled up inside her.

Her body was completely rejecting the food. It wasn't something she could overcome with willpower.

"...Take it all away—"

—Creak!

At that moment, someone sat down beside her.

At first, she was startled, thinking it might be a maid, but she recognized who it was even before she lifted her head.

A musty smell of dust and a hint of blood.

It was Kylo Allen's scent.

Sure enough, he was sitting next to her.

Growing steadily, he was now about three fingers taller than Vivian.

"You're not going to eat, right?"

Kylo Allen asked without even meeting her eyes.

Vivian looked at him with a mix of surprise and displeasure.

"...What?"

"You're not going to eat, are you? You just told the maids to clear it away."

"..."

When Vivian didn't answer, only then did Kylo Allen meet her gaze.

His expression seemed to ask why she wasn't responding.

She couldn't speak because she was too flustered.

Who would have imagined someone would sit next to her?

For the past half-year, or perhaps even longer... Vivian hadn't shared a dining table with anyone.

But Kylo Allen broke that routine with bewildering speed—in an immensely irritating way at that.

Rolling up his sleeves, Kylo Allen spoke.

"If you're just going to throw it away, I'll eat it."

He firmly grabbed the roasted duck's leg and tore it off heartily.

Muttering to himself, he said,

"...How long has it been since I've had duck."

"...."

Vivian didn't think Kylo was an idiot.

He must have known why she couldn't eat.

It had only been a few days since the poisoning attempt, and the castle was still in turmoil because of it.

All the retainers were overly protective, watching her every move.

But Kylo, who had actually helped her, acted as if nothing had happened.

As if he had forgotten about that day.

It was so absurd that Vivian asked,

"You... don't know why I'm like this?"

"Why does that matter?"

"That duck might also..."

Before she could say "Might also be poisoned," Kylo Allen bit into the duck leg.

The meat was so juicy that the drippings ran down his mouth.

"Oh, damn..." he muttered, hastily wiping his lips, seeming not to hear Vivian's words.

He continued his meal, quickly stripping the meat off the duck leg.

Perhaps it had been a long time since he'd had meat, as his face was full of happiness.

After two or three bites, the large duck leg disappeared except for the bone.

Even so, Kylo Allen didn't stop.

Without even swallowing the meat fully, he greedily reached out his hand.

Next was the breast meat.

Bones piled up in front of him one by one.

There didn't seem to be any poison in the meat. If there was, there was no way he wouldn't be reacting after eating that much.

As she blankly watched him, Kylo instead became annoyed.

"Go away."

"Huh?"

"Why are you still here?"

"...."

Vivian let out a hollow laugh.

Did he think she wasn't eating simply because she didn't want to?

What gave him the audacity to so brazenly eat someone else's food?

"I don't understand," However, it was Kylo who spoke first. "Whether you eat poison or starve to death, isn't it the same? From where I'm standing, starving to death seems harder."

"You've never been poisoned before..."

"If you're afraid of being poisoned, you can have the maids behind you taste it first."

The maids held their breath at Kylo's suggestion.

A clear expression of fear appeared on their faces.

"…"

It wasn't that Vivian had never thought of the method Kylo proposed. But to actually carry it out made her feel too selfish, and her conscience wouldn't allow it. It wasn't something a person should do.

A head of the family who forced her retainers to sacrifice themselves for her could never be a proper leader.

Perhaps Kylo had just said it casually. After all, he wasn't the type to pass his own tasks onto others.

So she knew well that his advice just now was merely to provoke her.

"Whatever. Suit yourself. I'd be happy to eat it all myself. It's been a while since I've had a feast."

Kylo continued to provoke her.

His hands, slick with duck grease, grabbed a soft piece of bread.

He tore into the bread heartily and stuffed it into his mouth.

"…"

...What is this?

Vivian thought.

As she continued to watch him, she found herself increasingly annoyed.

As he said, it was food she was going to throw away, and it shouldn't matter if Kylo ate it... but she kept thinking it was a waste.

"S-stop eating."

Before she knew it, Vivian blurted out.

—Pause.

"…"

At her words, Kylo momentarily froze.

His dark eyes turned toward Vivian.

Vivian was surprised at the words that had slipped from her mouth.

But at least she had conveyed her feelings properly.

"…"

"…"

...However, after a moment, Kylo, as if nothing had happened, continued to chew his food.

The food diminished with every moment.

Fruit, bread, vegetables, meat, even drinks...

As if he had a bag in his stomach, Kylo consumed the food without pause.

"S-stop gobbling down my food...!"

Vivian shouted again, this time in a harsher tone.

To be honest, it wasn't that she disliked the food disappearing; she resented that it was filling Kylo's stomach.

His continued provocations only made her more annoyed.

"How is this your food? You were going to throw it away."

Kylo's jaw didn't stop. Smacking his lips annoyingly, he gulped down the food.

"I-I didn't say to throw it away...?"

"Then you eat quickly, too."

Kylo replied, with an expression as if to say, "What kind of woman is this?"

"…"

Vivian looked down at the table again.

There was no food left on the table that Kylo hadn't touched.

This also meant that none of the food was poisoned.

Suddenly, Vivian felt both angry and... amazed by Kylo.

Does he have no fear at all?

How can he act like that knowing there might be poison?

Was he thinking that if he was going to die, he might as well die on a full stomach?

"…"

As she wrestled with her thoughts while looking at the food, she realized that her surroundings had grown quiet.

Before she knew it, Kylo was sneaking glances at her.

"Ahem."

When their eyes met, he resumed devouring the food as if nothing had happened.

Watching him eat without any manners, she could understand why people said Northerners were barbaric.

However, on the other hand, his forthrightness put her at ease.

His reckless yet hearty eating... somehow stimulated her appetite.

Earlier, she had felt nauseous, but now that feeling was gone.

Compared to before, the table—now half a mess—was less off-putting.

Even as she continued her thoughts, the food kept diminishing.

That also meant Kylo Allen's happiness was increasing.

In the end, she reached out her hand as if being pushed from behind.

She grabbed the remaining duck leg.

She heard the maids gasp in surprise once again.

Vivian, just like Kylo, grabbed the duck leg and tore into it.

The food, glistening with juices, looked quite appetizing this time.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd thought this way.

Putting down her fork and knife, she brought the leg to her mouth as Kylo did.

Holding the fork and knife reminded her of that day's events, which made her uncomfortable.

So now, she decided to act like Kylo.

Vivian took a deep breath.

She tried her best not to think about when she had swallowed poison.

Steeling herself, she took a small bite from the tip of the duck leg.

"What idiot-?"

Kylo clicked his tongue and frowned as if he'd seen something utterly distasteful.

"In our land, if you eat your food like that, you'd just get cursed at."

"…"

Annoyed by his words, she took a big bite of the meat this time.

The fragrant aroma of roasted duck filled her mouth.

Only then did Kylo nod.

"Yeah, that's how you should eat."

"…"

It was a very small thing, but she was surprised that his acknowledgment didn't feel bad.

How long had it been since someone praised her?

Feeling her emotions stir slightly because of this, she realized how broken she had become.

To hide such embarrassing feelings, she chewed the food more vigorously.

Vivian chewed and swallowed the food as if competing.

Now that Kylo had tested the food first and alleviated her anxiety, it was definitely easier to swallow than before.

For a while, they ate in silence.

It was a strange feeling.

She disliked having a meal with Kylo, but sharing a meal—not being alone—seemed to awaken forgotten emotions.

.

.

.

Kylo, having filled his stomach, took a sip of water to conclude his meal.

Empty dishes were scattered across the table.

Vivian had also managed to fill herself up.

In her frantic efforts to prevent Kylo from taking her food, she had eaten until she was full.

Wiping the grease from his hands with a prepared cloth, Kylo spoke nonchalantly.

"Let's keep doing this from now on."

"What?"

"I'll drop by during every mealtime, so make sure to prepare my food too."

Vivian furrowed her brow at the discomfort his proposal brought.

"You're saying we should continue eating together?"

But Kylo replied as if it were the most natural thing.

"It's better for both of us. You benefit from someone tasting your food first, and I get to enjoy delicious meals. Let's make use of each other."

Come to think of it, his suggestion wasn't entirely unreasonable.

Up until now, Vivian had been overly exposed to the danger of poison. She had no one to share her table with, nor did anyone wish to.

If Kylo could do this for her, it would be like having an extra layer of safety.

"...No, I don't want to."

But what came out of Vivian's mouth was habitual hostility.

Even though she knew his words were reasonable and justified, her emotions wouldn't allow it.

"Are you going to keep starving yourself?"

"…"

She couldn't refute Kylo's words.

Unable to do anything, she bit her lip tightly.

However, Kylo Allen was the one who made the final decision.

He stood up and ordered the maids waiting behind Vivian.

"You heard her. From now on, prepare my meal along with hers when setting up."

"…"

Vivian couldn't bring herself to tell them to ignore his words.

So the maids nodded toward Kylo.

Satisfied and with his stomach full, Kylo left without hesitation. As he exited the hall, she thought she heard him belching loudly.

"Haa..."

After he left, Vivian slowly lowered her head and rested her forehead on the table.

Her red hair cascaded down.

Only after he was gone did she realize she had been slightly tense in his presence.

Vivian couldn't believe the unspoken acceptance she had just given.

To think she would be having meals with Kylo Allen from now on. No matter how justified it was, it didn't make sense.

However, she could vaguely understand why she had done so.

The main reason was that she wanted to feel safe, but there were other reasons as well.

With so much happening, his presence had become natural.

They were no longer so awkward as to push each other away like before.

There was a kind of bond formed from fighting against the adults around them.

That's why, even though she knew the root cause of all these events was the Allen family, she maintained a strange closeness with Kylo Allen.

Because he was the only one who understood her struggles.

Each time life became harder, her hatred toward the Allen family deepened.

The wounds and pain inflicted by them continued to weigh heavily on Vivian.

But paradoxically, she kept getting entangled with Kylo Allen in her suffering.

As if putting on airs or pretending to be strong... they kept hovering around each other, sharing their pain.

"...This can't be."

Vivian couldn't suppress her emotions and whispered painfully as she closed her eyes.

She knew all too well that this wasn't right.

The Allen family was her enemy. All the people she loved had died at their hands.

But despite this hatred, she was getting closer to Kylo.

This shouldn't be happening, but it was hard to deny that his presence was becoming comforting.

Maybe that's why.

Regarding having meals with Kylo from now on, Vivian felt this way:

She disliked it—because they might end up fighting.

She was afraid—because he might keep provoking her by poking at her weaknesses.

She was disgusted—the idea of sharing a meal with her enemy didn't sit well with her.

...Lastly, she thought, just a little, that it might not be as terrible as she expected. Because she wouldn't have to eat alone anymore.

These complex emotions left her feeling confused.

– – – The End of The Chapter – – –

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