Chapter 93: Awakening (3)

Knock, knock, knock

-“Unnie.”

The unwelcome noise rouses Asena from her slumber in the dawn.

As she transitions from dream to reality, the sound grows louder.

Knock, knock, knock.

-“Unnie.”

Slowly blinking her eyes open, Asena wakes up from her sleep.

It had been a long time since someone had woken her up. The last person to do so… had been Cayden, back at home.

When he softly called her name, a smile would creep onto Asena’s face. She would naturally follow the usual flow, reaching out her arms to embrace him, savoring his scent and warmth as he carried her to the window. He would reciprocate with kisses on her cheeks.

Now, the situation was completely reversed.

Through the window, the azure hues of dawn seeped into the room.

The cold morning wind howled through the window she hadn’t managed to close, and the candles that hadn’t been put out had melted away.

Warmth was nowhere to be found—Ah, there was one place where a faint trace of warmth lingered.

It wasn’t from the plush, high-quality comforter, nor the soft bed.

It was from the letter from Cayden held in her hand.

As if it were an extension of her own heart, a subtle warmth emanated from it.

Asena knew why Keirsey had woken her up so early in the dawn.

It must have been to take Cayden’s letter away.

“.........”

So, quite childishly, Asena didn’t respond. She continued to feign sleep.

From the start, Asena had thought it was crossing a line to approach her so early.

The promise to return it “tomorrow” didn’t mean at the crack of dawn. It meant in the morning when she was headed to class.

As she continued to ignore the knocks, the door creaked open.

- Creeeeak.

Asena sharply cast her gaze toward the open door.

“.......”

Upon seeing Asena’s alert eyes, Keirsey hesitated for a moment.

“...Were you awake?”

“.......”

Startled for a moment, Keirsey then turned her attention to the letter clenched in Asena’s hand. After swallowing hard, she spoke.

“...I’ll take it now.”

“...Was this so urgent that you had to wake me up this early?”

“...Sorry.”

With that, Keirsey briskly approached and reached for Cayden’s letter.

Without even realizing it, Asena clutched the letter to her chest.

Keirsey’s expression became increasingly tense.

“......”

“...Unnie, we agreed you’d give it to me today.”

“...We agreed it would be this morning.”

“It is morning.”

“It’s dawn.”

“...Who makes that distinction?”

“Keirsey, didn’t you also wait until morning to give it to me yesterday?”

“That’s because you didn’t take it, Unnie.”

“...You sure have a way with words, waking people up this early.”

“Whatever the case, I’m taking it now.”

Keirsey reached her hand into Asena’s embrace.

Automatically, Asena clenched the letter tightly. She couldn’t let go of the only source of warmth she had.

While it was nothing compared to the warmth Cayden had provided when he was by her side, she couldn’t let it go when she had nothing else.

Truly, just as one would desperately inhale through their nose or mouth when suffocating, or hastily withdraw their body when hurt, clutching the letter tightly was a reflexive act to survive.

It wasn’t that she was reluctant to give it to Keirsey, nor was it a manifestation of some clinging greed.

However, the outcome was horrifying.

Keirsey’s grip was as reflexive as Asena herself, and as a result...

- Rip!

The letter was torn.

Both of them, shocked by that dreadful sound, quickly pulled their hands away, but it was already too late.

“...Ah...”

As the letter was ruined, its warmth vanished in an instant, and the room’s atmosphere grew even colder than before.

And as if blaming each other, the twins’ gazes clashed in mid-air.

Neither spoke, but their eyes said volumes. However, neither backed down.

****

Keirsey was suppressing her anger.

Nine days were left. She had no idea how she would endure that period.

It was unfair. Asena at least had the letter until yesterday. She couldn’t stand the fact that it got torn just when it was her turn.

Although they didn’t throw away the torn letter, the fact that something precious was ruined irritated her.

Now, with both the presence and traces of Cayden gone, it was incredibly uncomfortable and difficult.

They realized anew just how much they had relied on him.

This felt as if they were experiencing a future where everything goes wrong, and he leaves—making it all the more terrifying.

Still, Keirsey picked up pen and paper. During mealtime, when everyone else was eating, Keirsey wrote a letter to send to Cayden in her room.

Though she was boiling with rage, she didn’t include a shred of negative emotion in the letter. She penned stories that he would find charming or that would make him think she was cute.

She wrote carefully, revising and editing the words she wanted to say.

And just as she was about to fold the paper after writing the final line...

...her hand hesitated. She had sent many letters before, but not once had she received a reply from him. Now, even his letter was torn, and she found herself craving any trace of him more than ever.

After agonizing hundreds of times over, Keirsey picked up her pen again.

She appended an everyday greeting to the letter.

P.S. Oppa, I miss you. Could you send me just one reply? Are you busy?

The postscript contained all the feelings she had suppressed to avoid making him uncomfortable, as well as her personal request.

Despite knowing it was wrong, the anger coursing through her propelled her into action.

After much contemplation, she swallowed hard and folded the letter. She felt she shouldn’t, but there was no alternative.

Perhaps Cayden wouldn’t care at all. He might even reply immediately. But Keirsey, knowing nothing of what he would do, couldn’t afford the luxury of peace of mind.

Even as the wax melted, she contemplated several times whether to rewrite the letter without the postscript or to send it as is.

In the end, she couldn’t contain her impulse. She finalized the letter—filled with her longing for him—by sealing it with a stamp bearing the Pryster emblem.

****

-Growl-

A sound erupted from Keirsey’s stomach, starved from the time spent writing the letter.

But it didn’t matter. Sending the letter to her Oppa took precedence over food.

If just this once he replies, she could endure this discomfort.

And she had brought something else.

The torn letter from Cayden.

Although she couldn’t do anything about it, perhaps the servants at the academy could find a way to restore it.

“You’re here again today.”

A familiar face extended a hand towards her.

It was the academy’s servant who collected letters.

“For Lord Cayden Pryster of the Pryster estate...is that correct?”

Before Keirsey could even speak, the servant inquired.

Keirsey nodded her head.

For some reason, the servant continued to engage her in conversation.

“Miss Keirsey seems to be on good terms with her older brother.”

Given the servant worked at the academy, she was familiar with most of the offspring of notable families. It was a basic requirement of the job.

Of course, it was impossible to know everyone given the sheer number of people, but no one was unfamiliar with the Pryster family.

Keirsey wanted to wholeheartedly agree with the servant’s comment, but for some reason, only an awkward laugh escaped her lips.

“...Ahaha...”

She wanted to change the subject.

Not keen on indulging in trivial chatter, she pulled out the now-yellowed and torn piece of paper from her belongings.

“...Um, could you possibly mend this?”

As she spoke, Keirsey felt embarrassed. She couldn’t precisely pinpoint why. Maybe she felt pathetic for having let the letter reach this state.

Up until now, she had hugged her brother, been caressed by him, received his affection, and even kissed... him.

So, it might also be that she felt a sense of shame for being like this because she couldn’t let go of even a simple letter.

The servant’s expression turned apologetic.

“...I’m sorry, Miss Keirsey. There’s no way to mend this torn paper. If the content is that important to you, perhaps a transcription--”

“No, it’s okay.”

Biting her lip, Keirsey gave up. What she wanted wasn’t a copy with the same content; she wanted the very letter that held the touch of Cayden.

Unknowingly, her expression must have been twisted enough to startle the servant, who visibly jumped.

Keirsey didn’t particularly want to comfort the startled servant. Words of simple reassurance wouldn’t come out of her mouth.

Instead, she let out a brief sigh and turned to leave.

“...Huh?”

At that moment, a familiar emblem caught her eye.

A letter sealed with the Pryster emblem.

It wasn’t something she wrote, nor was it written by Asena.

It was a letter received by the academy, sent from the Pryster estate.

Keirsey immediately leaned close to the desk.

“Is that...! Is that by any chance from my oppa?”

The servant, who had been shrinking back, straightened up at the brightening tone of Keirsey’s voice.

Her gaze followed Keirsey’s finger to a single letter.

“...Ah, yes! This was sent by Cayden Pryster.”

Keirsey felt her heart pounding as a smile appeared on her face. Finally, it had arrived—Nine days before the end of the semester. Twenty-odd days since Cayden left. Fourteen days since his last letter.

What did he send this time? Would it contain the warm words he usually wrote?

Thoughts like ‘Should I take it without Unnie knowing?’ brushed through her mind.

Keirsey reached out her hand and spoke.

“Ah, then I’ll take it. May I have it?”

The servant blinked, eyes darting around as if in a predicament. Just as annoyance started bubbling up in Keirsey, the servant spoke.

“...Uh...I can’t give it to you if you’re not the intended recipient...”

“.......Excuse me?”

Keirsey felt her heart sinking.

Words she initially didn’t understand eventually sunk into her as time passed.

“I am the intended... ”

“...The letter is not for you, Miss Keirsey.”

She had longed for a letter every single day. Had been looking forward to this moment. Had even fought petty fights with Asena. And it wasn’t even hers.

In a moment, Keirsey quickly masked her icy expression with a bright one.

“Ah, I see. That’s fine then. I’ll deliver it for you. Who is the letter intended for?”

The servant finally relaxed, exhaling a sigh of relief.

“It’s for Miss Daisy today.”

“.....Today?”

Unwittingly, Keirsey found herself repeating the servant’s perplexing words.

She suddenly realized that this wasn’t the first time Cayden had sent a letter.

She couldn’t make sense of it right now.

All this time, sending as many as three letters a day, he had never once replied to her. Yet, had he been writing to Daisy? Perhaps even to Judy?

Keirsey lightly plucked the letter from the hesitant servant’s hand. The servant, for her part, couldn’t freely comment on Keirsey’s actions.

And Keirsey had no room to care about that. She turned away, solely focusing on Cayden’s letter.

She had been holding back all this time, gritting her teeth and enduring it. The reason she was able to bear it was because she knew that Cayden was safe in Pryster territory. At least when he was there, he wouldn’t be conversing with other women. Their relationship wouldn’t be progressing.

But he had been getting closer to other women through channels they didn’t even know about.

While he didn’t give a single response to the words they sent, he kindly replied to other women with his elegant handwriting.

Upon realizing this, it struck her that he wasn’t too busy to send her a letter. She realized that it wasn’t a matter of him not having the emotional space to write.

He simply chose not to write to her.

Her brother, who had always made her his priority, was now doing nothing for her. No, he was outright ignoring her.

She could guess why, but that made it all the more despairing, and that’s why...an odd emotion welled up within her.

It was hard to put into words. The shock was so sudden that she needed time to understand this feeling.

It was too much. How much she missed him. How she couldn’t breathe without him. How she had suppressed her desires and followed his words unconditionally.

....Was this the price she had to pay?

As his obedient younger sister, was she supposed to just get pushed away as he pushed?

...Or should she not listen to him?

Tears welled up, and her hands trembled. She felt foolish for having fought with Asena over a single letter that had lacked any words of affection.

Keirsey returned straight to her room.

She sat down and without hesitation removed the Pryster seal that sealed the letter. She could reseal it with her own seal later.

“............”

And there it was. All the words she had longed to hear.

It wasn’t one of the stiff letters he had sent her; it was a letter imbued with his warm tone. The version of him she had missed was right there.

It wasn’t the Cayden who had told her to leave his room last time; it was the Cayden whose eyes seemed to light up at the sight of her, who worried about her with affection.

Warnings about the hot weather, encouragement to finish the semester well, and promises to see each other later.

Small inquiries about well-being, written in his meticulous handwriting, filled the letter.

Keirsey found herself smiling unwittingly. Even she couldn’t understand why she was smiling.

Perhaps the whirlpool of new emotions she was feeling was intriguing enough to bring a smile to her face.

However, unlike her smile, the words that flowed from her lips were as sharp as steel blades: “Wow... so my love is being ignored by you, huh?”

Though the smile still didn’t leave her lips.

“Oppa… Don’t you know that I’m the one who loves you the most?”

Keirsey was tired of crying.

She understood now was not the time to shed tears - but to take action.

Thinking so, a single resolve settled in her heart—No more negotiations.

---  End Of The Chapter ---

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