Picking Up Unrequited Love Chapter 20

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Chapter 20: What Handmade Chocolate Means

Chocolates were visible all around the hallway.

Today was White Day, so some boys were giving chocolates to girls.

Probably most of them were couples, right? White Day confessions weren’t that common, after all.

Watching the smiling men and women in the hallway, I unknowingly felt a sense of anticipation welled up within me.

Yet, I found it strange that I held such anticipation while shifting my gaze towards Han-gyeol’s seat.

Could he possibly give me one too...?

“Eun-ha, did you get any chocolate from Han-gyeol?”

“Ah—?! No?! I don’t think Han-gyeol cares much about White Day. Besides, he always brings me snacks, so I’m content with that.”

“He gives you snacks?”

“Huh? Han-gyeol gives me candy almost every day, you know?”

“Oh, really? I’ve never seen Han-gyeol give candy to anyone.”

“Ah—?!”

So, he was giving them only to me...

I felt a little happy.

“Hehe…”

“Eun-ha?”

“Ah! It’s nothing!”

I accidentally let out a smile.

Maybe once he got closer, he would give candy to Harim as well?

“Hmm- Would he give me some if I ask?”

“Are you talking about the orange-flavored candy?”

“Oh, there’s a specific flavor too? Yeah, that one.”

“I guess he might if you ask?”

“I wonder~”

Harim looked down at me with a slightly ambiguous smile.

All I did was hurriedly shift my gaze out the window.

When lunchtime came, I planned to have lunch with Han-gyeol, but he was nowhere to be found in the classroom.

As I wondered where Han-gyeol was, I saw him through the window talking to Jang Yujin.

The window was slightly open, so I could hear bits of their conversation.

I didn’t mean to eavesdrop... but I heard them.

“I told you, the constant of integration doesn’t necessarily have to be positive.”

“Looking at the outcome, it seems you’re right... and could anyone even hate it since it’s handmade chocolate?”

“That’s true. Ah- Fine, I’ll decide.”

“Okay, let me know your decision later. Enjoy your meal.”

Handmade chocolate...?

Swish-

Han-gyeol entered the classroom after finishing his conversation.

“Eun-ha?”

“Ah—! Han-gyeol! Shall we go eat?”

“Oh, sure. What’s for lunch today?”

“I think they’re serving some chocolate snacks because it’s White Day?”

“Really? Sounds exciting. Let’s go.”

As we headed to the cafeteria, Han-gyeol was unusually quiet today.

From his conversation with Jang Yujin, it was clear that he was going to give chocolate to someone.

I couldn’t help but wonder if that someone might be me, but that was probably just my overactive imagination, right?

Still, I was curious.

Who would be the recipient of Han-gyeol’s handmade chocolate?

And since he brought it to school, it must be a student here, right?

Someone from our class, maybe? Or another class? If so, who?

“Eun-ha, is there something on my face?”

“Huh...?! No! I was just lost in thought.”

“Is that so? Ah- enjoy your lunch.”

“You too, Han-gyeol.”

Throughout lunch, my mind was preoccupied with thoughts of chocolate.

In the end, I couldn’t finish my meal.

“Eun-ha, did you finish eating?”

“Ah—, yeah. I’m not very hungry today.”

“Are you not feeling well? Do you want to go to the infirmary?”

“Huh? No, I’m fine. I just don’t have much of an appetite.”

“Ah, I see.”

After lunch, we headed straight back to the classroom.

Should I ask him before brushing my teeth? I pondered.

We had grown quite close, so it wouldn’t be entirely out of line to ask who he likes, right?

But... I just couldn’t bring myself to ask so casually.

“Alright, Eun-ha. I’m going to brush my teeth.”

“Ah—, okay...!”

Hesitation got the best of me, and Han-gyeol walked out of the classroom.

At least he didn’t give any handmade chocolate to me.

My eyes naturally drifted to his hands.

Should I not get my hopes up?

***

During the afternoon classes, I didn’t really talk to Han-gyeol.

But every break, I checked where he was and whether he was holding anything in his hands.

By the time the fifth and sixth periods had ended, and all afternoon classes were over, I still hadn’t figured out who the recipient of Han-gyeol’s handmade chocolate would be.

After all the classes, Han-gyeol picked up his bag and walked over to me.

Could it be?!

“Eun-ha, let’s study together.”

“Ah—, sure. Harim went straight home today, so you can sit next to me.”

“Okay. Is it alright if I ask you questions if I get stuck?”

“Of course. And I’ll do the same?”

“Sounds like a fair deal.”

Han-gyeol opened his reference book and started studying.

I didn’t want to disturb him, but curiosity was eating me up.

I wanted to cautiously broach some topics before asking my burning question.

“Ah—, is your wrist okay, Han-gyeol?”

“Ah... yeah. It felt better when I woke up.”

“I see.”

“Mhm.”

And just like that, the conversation came to a halt.

This wasn’t what I had in mind.

Should I muster a little courage?

Yes! I’ll just go ahead and ask!

“Um, Han-gyeol.”

“Yeah? Is there something you don’t understand?”

“Uh...did you give chocolate to anyone today?”

“Huh? No. Why?”

“Ah, no reason. Just curious because it’s White Day.”

“Oh—, so you want some chocolate?!”

“What?! No! That’s not what I meant!”

“Ah—, in that case...hold on a sec.”

Han-gyeol opened his bag and took something out.

My heart was pounding, hoping it might be handmade chocolate, but it was a ready-made chocolate.

“Here, this is for you, Eun-ha. I planned to give it to you earlier. Were you expecting something?”

“Wha-? Wow, thanks! I really didn’t think you’d actually give me chocolate...”

I managed a smile as I spoke, but I couldn’t help feeling a bit disappointed.

In the end... wasn’t this the difference between a friend and someone he liked?

Perhaps it was natural to give handmade chocolate to someone he had feelings for, and a ready-made chocolate to a friend.

Making handmade chocolate for someone wasn’t just about ‘making your own chocolate.’

How many men have ever made chocolate in their lives?

To go to the effort of making chocolate by hand means one wants to give a special gift to someone precious.

The mere thought of this would make any woman happy.

And any woman would imagine it, right?

She would envision the entire process that went into making that chocolate.

The trips to the grocery store, deliberating over which chocolate to buy.

The awkwardness of facing a range of unfamiliar tools.

The potential embarrassment of placing seemingly unmasculine items on the checkout counter.

And what about back at home?

What excuses might he have given to family members who asked whom he was making chocolate for?

Sure, he might have come up with a variety of excuses while making the chocolate, but they’d likely see right through him.

Maybe he sweated as he melted the packaged chocolate in hot water and stirred it with a spoon.

Perhaps things weren’t going well, so he had to play a tutorial video on his smartphone.

After all the effort of melting the chocolate, he must have pondered about what shape to make it in.

He might also have deliberated over how to package it.

In essence, handmade chocolate was a special gift that encapsulates all those moments.

It was a visible token filled with a man’s every worry and emotion, in my opinion.

That was why the chocolate became even more special, sentimental, and too precious to eat.

There was a moment when I felt secretly envious of the girl who would receive such chocolate from Han-gyeol.

Still, I couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed.

Afterward, I managed to keep smiling as we studied and had dinner.

In the end, Han-gyeol didn’t find the girl to give his handmade chocolate to, but I was just curious anyway.

To be honest, there were times I wondered if I might be the one Han-gyeol likes.

Some of the things he had done for me have led me to think that way.

But now, I felt like I’d got my answer.

The person Han-gyeol liked wasn’t me.

I guessed the right thing to do was to support a friend’s love, right?

Why do I feel this sense of awkwardness?

Was it the anxiety that a close male friend might suddenly turn his attention elsewhere?

Or was it because I entertained the thought that he might like me, and he doesn’t?

Both were inherently selfish emotions.

“Eun-ha, ready to go if you’re done eating?”

“Ah- Yeah. Sorry, I was lost in thought for a moment. Haha.”

“You okay today? You seem a little down.”

“No, I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. Let’s go.”

If Han-gyeol ended up with the person he liked, we wouldn’t be able to continue like this anymore, would we?

Why did the walk home today feel so much shorter than usual?

Was it because the thought crossed my mind that this could be the last time?

In the end, we reached the point where we’d part ways, without having exchanged any words.

“Alright, Han-gyeol. See you tomorrow.”

“Ah... um, Eun-ha, wait a second!”

“Huh? Why?”

“Well, you see...”

And at that moment, Han-gyeol reached into the bag he was carrying on his back and pulled something out.

It was something wrapped beautifully, and he cautiously handed it to me.

I took it without saying a word and tilted my head in puzzlement.

Han-gyeol, scratching his cheek, spoke up.

“Look, it’s White Day, right? So, I was on my way home yesterday, and I just happened to see this chocolate-making kit! It didn’t look too difficult, so I got carried away and made it. But since it’s my first time, I had a hard time mixing it properly, and it didn’t even taste good! After I froze it and tried to take it out, it just cracked! So, the shape is a bit... weird. But the taste is actually pretty good, okay? I tried a few and they taste alright! I mean, they say you eat with your eyes too, but I promise, the overall taste is good! I originally wanted to give you this instead of the store-bought one, but the shape came out all wrong...”

Han-gyeol was explaining all this to me, clearly flustered.

I had never seen Han-gyeol this disconcerted before.

He must have been incredibly embarrassed.

And he must have been hesitating this whole time.

Perhaps from lunchtime or maybe since he arrived at school, he had been waiting for the right moment to give this to me.

If that was the case, then Han-gyeol spent the entire day at school thinking only about me.

I was not sure if I should even think that way.

But I wanted to believe it; I wanted to be deluded into thinking Han-gyeol thought about me all day.

The idea that he was worried about me made me incredibly happy.

My heart... It’s started to flutter.

Thump-thump? Ba-dump-ba-dump? Thump-Thump?

It was a wildly erratic beat, one I couldn’t even begin to describe with words.