Chapter 185: Request for Support (5)

 

Ner followed Berg.

 

For now, everything was going as she had hoped.

 

It was a situation where things had to go this way from the start.

 

She hadn’t lied to Berg at all.

 

The patients needed to be managed in different stages. It was inefficient to have severe and mild cases in the same room.

 

...However, in the process, Stockpin had lost its resting spaces, and as a result, Berg’s home... no, her original home, became accessible again.

 

Her request not to kiss was sincere. Though she didn’t know how the plague spread, she had heard that many couples across the kingdom were being infected together.

 

...And because of that, Ner could forbid Berg and the Saintess from kissing.

 

She didn’t want to act this way, but the circumstances gave her the strength to do so.

 

From the start, watching Berg and the Saintess kiss was unbearable.

 

Even if she tried to endure it, that was the one thing she couldn’t stand.

 

As Ner walked the familiar path, she headed home with Berg.

 

Every step they took brought back memories of the past.

 

She felt like she was about to cry... as if she might burst into tears from sadness at any moment.

 

But she continued on, calming the storm of emotions inside her.

 

Soon, in the distance, she saw her sanctuary.

 

The house where she and Berg had repaired what was broken.

 

It was she who had pulled Berg out of his dependency on alcohol.

 

She had cleared away all the bottles that had been scattered around the room.

 

She had torn out the rotting floorboards and fixed them.

 

She had cleaned the basement, which was overrun with rats.

 

She had found new lacquer for the walls and new furniture.

 

“...”

 

That thought squeezed Ner’s heart.

 

That was her and Berg’s home.

 

It was the place where they had taken their first steps as a couple.

 

But now... it was a place she could only visit with permission.

 

And in front of that house, someone was already waiting for them.

 

It was Sien, a member of the Human race, who had shed her Saintess robes and was now dressed plainly, like a country girl.

 

She didn’t seem to notice Ner and Lan trailing behind Berg, as she smiled brightly at him.

 

If love could be seen through one’s eyes, it would look exactly like that.

 

Her happiness at being near Berg was palpable.

 

She opened her arms wide at the sight of him.

 

Then, bouncing up and down, she urged him to embrace her.

 

From the front, Ner could hear Berg chuckle softly.

 

“...”

 

A burning jealousy surged within her as his smile was directed at another woman.

 

It was an emotion she couldn’t afford to show.

 

That spot was supposed to be hers.

 

That happiness was something she should be enjoying right now.

 

But all of it had been lost due to one huge mistake.

 

“...Ha...”

 

Lan sighed beside her as she watched, as if she could see the difficult future that awaited Ner.

 

Berg hurried his steps and embraced Sien.

 

-Whack!

 

“I’ve been waiting for you, Bell...”

 

“Yeah.”

 

He lifted her up with joy, exchanging emotions.

 

They pressed their foreheads gently together.

 

Their eyes locked in a long gaze.

 

“...”

 

...Ner could only watch as her partner held Sien in his arms.

 

It felt like her heart was being torn apart, yet she couldn’t do anything.

 

The only person in this world who had ever stood by her was now loving another woman.

 

She had anticipated this, but this was the first time she was actually seeing it.

 

This was the first time she had ever witnessed Berg loving someone else so deeply.

 

The pain in her heart spread throughout her entire body.

 

The more she loved Berg, the more it hurt.

 

She couldn’t help but imagine herself in that position.

 

...If she had stayed in that position, she would have been smiling like that woman named Sien.

 

She would have been sharing unwavering love with Berg.

 

If she had accepted him from the beginning. If she hadn’t rejected his offer to spend the night together.

 

“...It’s beautiful.”

 

Lan whispered beside her.

 

It was probably a statement without any particular intention.

 

The way those two were deeply lost in each other did indeed look beautiful, even to Ner.

 

Like the bard’s song whom she had punished a few days ago... their love story could be called romantic.

 

A wealthy Human girl and a poor boy from the slums. Despite endless separations, they ultimately reunited through their feelings for each other.

 

It was a love story that echoed throughout the entire kingdom.

 

...And in that song, Ner was an obstacle.

 

It was something she could hardly bear.

 

She had been hated all her life, and Berg was the first person to ever love her.

 

Her time with Berg, their marriage, was the most precious and sweet period of her life.

 

They were memories she could never trade for anything.

 

But now, everyone said that period was just an obstacle to Sien and Berg’s love story.

 

She had suffered all her life, and even that brief moment of love she received was dismissed by everyone.

 

-Drip...

 

“...Huh?”

 

Ner was startled by the liquid that suddenly flowed from her eyes.

 

Lan calmly handed her a handkerchief and whispered.

 

“Wipe your tears.”

 

“...”

 

“...There’s nothing uglier than the tears of a loser.”

 

“......”

 

Ner couldn’t argue with her and quickly wiped away her tears.

 

She hadn’t come here to cry.

 

Remembering her purpose, she steeled herself once more.

 

She had come here to be loved by Berg again.

 

And she didn’t care what form that love took.

 

While she was doing so, Berg seemed to have finished talking with Sien, and they turned their gaze towards her.

 

Sien approached, holding onto Berg’s arm with a complicated expression.

 

Berg didn’t seem particularly comfortable either.

 

‘...Smile at me, Berg.’

 

Ner silently repeated a wish that even she knew made no sense.

 

‘...I was... your first wife...’

 

Ner clutched the small pouch hanging from her waist.

 

Inside were the rings that Berg and she had taken off.

 

“...I can make space for you.”

 

She responded as Sien approached.

 

“...But are you sure you’ll be okay with that?”

 

It was a statement that sounded almost like a warning.

 

Sien’s hostility towards her was blatantly clear.

 

Considering Ner was Berg’s former wife, it was understandable.

 

She could understand Sien’s behavior.

 

She had acted the same way herself.

 

The only difference was that Sien seemed to display a certain level of confidence.

 

It was as if she didn’t care much because Berg was already hers.

 

Ner couldn’t help but wonder if this was also a result of the abolition of polygamy.

 

Sien continued speaking.

 

“...Just because you’re here, don’t expect me to change how I act.”

 

“...”

 

In other words, she had no intention of being considerate even if Ner stayed in the house.

 

She wasn’t going to hide her affection for Berg.

 

Ner wasn’t unafraid of this warning.

 

In fact, it became the most terrifying warning of all.

 

Perhaps Sien was indirectly, yet clearly, expressing her rejection.

 

It was as if she were asking Ner not to enter her home.

 

“...It’s fine.”

 

But Ner couldn’t back down, no matter what Sien said.

 

Even if it was pitiful, she wanted to stay by Berg’s side.

 

“...I truly have nowhere else to go...”

 

The excuse she offered was, in a way, a final attempt to preserve her dignity.

 

It was also a statement to ease the burden on Berg and Sien, even if just a little.

 

At that, Sien eventually looked up at Berg.

 

She nodded her head, and with her nod, Berg finally opened the door to the house.

 

“...”

 

Ner, with great difficulty and after so long, was able to return to her home.

 

.

.

.

.

 

The house hadn’t changed at all.

 

Everything remained exactly as she had dreamed it would.

 

The floorboards she had fixed with Berg.

 

The carvings she had etched into the wood with her fingernails.

 

The familiar scent that lingered in the house.

 

Deciding on the rooms was easy after that.

 

Lan took one of the spare rooms on the second floor.

 

Ner decided to use her original room.

 

With the sun having set, everyone gathered for dinner.

 

It wasn’t a meal befitting a noble’s reception, but since the Reiker family was newly established, they weren’t much different from commoners.

 

Ner had to sit quietly and watch as Sien served the meal.

 

She could only observe the close bond between them.

 

“Try a bite, Bell. Does it taste a bit off...?”

 

“...I think it’s fine... but I’m not sure if everyone else will agree...”

 

“...Bell...!”

 

“No, I think it’s delicious. I was just being honest.”

 

Berg, with his playful demeanor, kept making Sien smile.

 

Ner, watching from afar, couldn’t help but imagine herself in Sien’s place.

 

Compared to the life of a noble, it was a life with a vast distance, but... that side looked so much happier.

 

If it meant receiving the name Reiker,’ Ner would gladly give up all the advantages that came with the name ‘Blackwood.’

 

Berg then playfully cupped Sien’s face, smiling as he whispered to her.

 

Ner barely caught the words.

 

“...I’d like to kiss you, but I guess we’ll have to wait a little longer.”

 

-Thud.

 

Her heart sank at those words.

 

It was only natural... but every time she faced reality, it felt like a nail was being driven into her chest.

 

She still hadn’t gotten used to the fact that Berg was loving another woman.

 

Sien, smiling beautifully at his words, carried the food over to Ner and Lan.

 

“...Please enjoy your meal. I’m sorry there’s not much.”

 

Lan, seeing that Ner was still too stunned to respond, answered in her stead.

 

“It’s fine. We’ll eat well.”

 

Her cold and curt response still maintained the etiquette expected of a noble.

 

Ner also quietly expressed her thanks to Sien.

 

Thanking the woman who was constantly sharing kisses with Berg felt like an act that diminished her own worth.

 

“...Thank you... for the meal.”

 

The meal continued in an awkward atmosphere.

 

But Berg and Sien continued to exchange smiles and glances, whispering to each other.

 

It was painfully obvious that they were holding back their affection in front of her.

 

Even though they said they wouldn’t change their behavior, they were showing some degree of consideration.

 

But for Ner, it only made things harder.

 

Her thoughts spiraled into darker and darker scenarios.

 

How would the two of them live together normally?

 

What would it feel like for them to share meals alone every day?

 

How much deeper had their love grown?

 

Had they ever sat down for a meal only to be overwhelmed by their passion afterward?

 

The more she thought about it, the darker her thoughts became.

 

Ner was tormented by these thoughts.

 

At that moment, she heard Berg chuckle softly.

 

Whenever she had been struggling in the past, he would laugh like that and gently pat her head.

 

Reflexively, Ner looked up at Berg, but his gaze was fixed on Sien.

 

“.......”

 

She couldn’t help but feel how much had changed.

 

In the quiet of the moment, Sien was the first to set down her spoon.

 

Berg noticed and asked her about it.

 

“...Eat more. There’s plenty left.”

 

“I’m full, Bell.”

 

“You need to eat more. That way, you’ll stay healthy.”

 

“...Still...”

 

“...I’m worried, so please eat more. You’ve barely eaten half of what you usually do.”

 

“...”

 

“...Sien...?”

 

“...The smell is a bit different from usual.”

 

At the same time, Sien covered her mouth with her hand.

 

Ner, hearing those casual words, was suddenly struck by a devastating thought.

 

‘...What...?’

 

Maybe Berg was particularly concerned about Sien’s health because of something special. Perhaps that was why Sien had seemed to struggle through the meal.

 

-Clatter...

 

Startled, Ner dropped her spoon, causing everyone to look at her, frozen in place.

 

Ner blinked rapidly, struggling to find her voice.

 

“...Is it possible...?”

 

Berg looked at her, and without saying anything, he gave a small nod.

 

-Rattle...!!

 

Ner shot up from her seat at that confirmation.

 

Lan was also surprised by her sudden movement but didn’t say anything.

 

Ner urgently needed to find an excuse.

 

She couldn’t breathe, and she felt like she was going to burst into tears.

 

She needed to find a place to hide and let out the pain tearing at her heart.

 

“I... I’m full too. Be... Berg. Thank you for the meal. I just need to get some fresh air.”

 

But everyone understood the real reason behind her actions, and no one tried to stop her.

 

****

 

Ner hid in the forest, crying alone for a long time.

 

Berg was going to have a child.

 

And that child wasn’t hers.

 

Berg had created a child with Sien first.

 

After their divorce, Berg had been steadily moving forward with his life.

 

In retrospect, it made sense.

 

Berg always knew how to get back up after a fall.

 

Even when he lost comrades and blamed himself, when he was pushed into impossible situations, when he lost his brother, or when he collapsed from intense training...

 

In the end, he always got back up and kept moving forward.

 

He had already moved on from their divorce and was building a new family.

 

It was only she who remained stuck in the same place.

 

She still hadn’t let go of Berg, and that’s why she was wandering, struggling like this.

 

In truth, she already knew.

 

Everything with Berg was over.

 

It had ended the moment she tried to put his loved ones in grave danger.

 

“Ugh... hhk...”

 

She should have realized this a long time ago... but she had been in denial all along.

 

Berg was starting a new family.

 

They were a normal couple, just like any other Human pair, continuing their marriage.

 

It wasn’t a union between different species, and there would be no half-breed children.

 

Now, Ner was just an obstacle to him.

 

She had to watch from afar as he lived a beautiful life with his kind and gentle wife, raising adorable daughters and sons.

 

It was the right thing to do—to let him go, to become an outsider once again.

 

She had seen it all day long and could feel it too.

 

Berg had found happiness.

 

He struggled with his duties as a lord, but he had formed a deep bond with his wife by his side.

 

Even the usually cold Lan had acknowledged that they made a beautiful family.

 

Ner, despite wanting to deny it, found it hard to argue that they were a well-matched pair.

 

And that fact tore her apart.

 

She knew they were a perfect couple.

 

She knew that Berg couldn’t possibly be happier than he was now.

 

She knew there was no place for her to fit in.

 

...And so, Ner realized that she would no longer have any chance.

 

Just like all her life, she was left with nothing but the prospect of living in solitude once again.

 

It wasn’t as if she hadn’t had opportunities.

 

An endlessly happy future had awaited her, but... she had kicked that chance away herself.

 

The weight of that terrifying reality pressed down on her.

 

It made the tears keep flowing.

 

...And yet, she knew in her mind.

 

It was right to let Berg go now.

 

Seeing it for herself made her feelings even clearer.

 

But still, lingering attachments held her back.

 

Even in this moment, when she was shedding tears, a part of her mind was still thinking.

 

...What if Berg comes to find her?

 

He used to always come looking for her when she wandered out into the forest late at night.

 

He was the one who used to protect her, to worry about her.

 

Maybe he would do so again.

 

...Of course, it didn’t take long for her to realize how foolish that hope was.

 

Even if Berg was genuinely concerned about her, he wasn’t the kind of man who would leave his pregnant wife to come after her.

 

Ner finally accepted this and started to head back home.

 

She calmed herself, letting the tears subside... settling her emotions.

 

She kept replaying the image of Berg that she had seen all day in her mind.

 

He looked truly happy.

 

She kept thinking about it, but... Berg really did seem happy.

 

If she loved him, the right thing to do was to let him go.

 

She needed to stop burdening him and instead, bless the happy life he was leading.

 

“...”

 

Before she knew it, she had reached the house.

 

But instead of approaching the front door, she found herself quietly standing by a window.

 

It was deep into the night.

 

Ner stealthily peeked through the window into the master bedroom.

 

Her eyes, sharp even in the dark, allowed her to see everything clearly.

 

Soon, Ner spotted the Human couple fast asleep.

 

Berg, as always, was sleeping with his upper body exposed.

 

He had even followed Ner’s new rules, wearing a mask over his face.

 

Next to him lay Sien, resting her head on his arm.

 

“...”

 

Even from this brief glimpse, they looked like a beautiful couple.

 

She couldn’t imagine a pair that matched better.

 

“...I should let him go, shouldn’t I...?”

 

Ner found herself whispering in a resigned tone, barely recognizing her own voice.

 

.

.

.

 

“Haa... Haa...”

 

But when Ner came to her senses, she found herself already inside the room.

 

“...Huh...?”

 

Breathing heavily, she suddenly realized the situation she was in.

 

The door behind her was quietly ajar, and in front of her lay Berg, asleep on the bed.

 

She had already sneaked into the master bedroom.

 

Berg and Sien were peacefully asleep, wrapped in each other’s warmth, completely unaware of Ner’s presence.

 

“...Ah.”

 

But in that moment of clarity, she understood everything in an instant.

 

She realized why she had come here so stealthily.

 

She had been trying to convince herself all along.

 

Telling herself she needed to let Berg go, that it was the right thing to do, that she needed to choose the noble path.

 

But in the end, she knew.

 

It was impossible.

 

No matter how happy Berg seemed, Ner still wanted his love.

 

She wanted to be petted and adored like she used to be.

 

She wanted to share kisses, to be intimate with him.

 

She wanted to bear his child, to cry tears of joy.

 

As she understood this, tears began to flow once more.

 

“...I’m sorry... Berg...”

 

She whispered softly.

 

“...I’m sorry... hhk...”

 

Berg didn’t wake up.

 

At the same time, Ner’s eyes glinted with determination.

 

“...I’m sorry... but...”

 

The desire that had built up over many cycles of estrus kept pulling her toward this man.

 

She could no longer resist the scent that emanated from him.

 

Carefully, she lifted Berg’s mask.

 

She whispered again.

 

“...But you made me this way.”

 

And with that, she pressed her lips to his.

 

His wife was right next to him, but she stole a kiss from him.

 

She had told him not to kiss anyone... and yet she took his lips for herself.

 

But Ner didn’t feel that this was wrong.

 

If anything, it felt like something she should have done long ago.

 

After all, she was his first wife.

 

...She was simply reclaiming her husband.

 

After a light kiss, she reluctantly pulled away.

 

The warmth of Berg’s lips still lingered vividly on hers.

 

“Haa... Haa...”

 

With that, Ner quickly turned and left the room.

 

A powerful mix of guilt... and the twisted pleasure that came from her forbidden act surged within her.

– – – The End of The Chapter – – –

 

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