Chapter 198: Ner’s Choice (2)

 

Ner couldn’t sleep for the next few days.

 

As Sien’s condition worsened, she poured all her energy into creating medicine.

 

But, it may have already been too late.

 

Berg would never want to hear such words... but it was the truth.

 

Even if she managed to craft a perfect, more effective remedy, it wouldn’t matter if the body had grown this weak.

 

To heal a body as frail as Sien’s, it would take nothing short of a miracle, some kind of sorcery, or magic.

 

“...”

 

It wasn’t because Ner was so worried about Sien that she was doing this.

 

She was only worried about Berg, who was worried about Sien.

 

As Sien’s health rapidly deteriorated and ominous rumors about Krund spread, Berg seemed to be growing more and more weary.

 

At the same time, the demon’s whispers were still with her.

 

What kind of future would unfold without Sien?

 

Perhaps this was her chance?

 

Even as she shook her head, even as she forcefully hit her own head to reject the thoughts... the whispers echoed louder and louder in her mind.

 

Maybe it was because she knew just how sweet that forbidden fruit could be.

 

The days she spent with Berg were an unforgettable happiness to her.

 

But somewhere, deep down, she knew.

 

If Sien were to die, there was no chance she would be the one to receive Berg’s love in her place.

 

It was just a feeling.

 

And somehow, she knew... it was an impossible outcome.

 

Ner too was enduring her own grueling journey.

 

Studying endlessly with no rest, while taking care of Sien.

 

And yet, she couldn’t help but envy Sien, who had everything she ever wanted.

 

When she wiped the sweat from Sien’s body... she wondered if Berg’s hands had ever touched that same body.

 

When she cleaned the corners of Sien’s mouth after she vomited... she wondered if Berg had kissed those lips before.

 

When she pulled the blanket over Sien’s stomach, she thought of the child that might have been Berg’s.

 

And as she watched Sien sleeping... she wondered how many times Berg had stood guard over her like this.

 

It wasn’t easy to push through these thoughts while still caring for Sien.

 

It was like running a marathon without water.

 

“...”

 

If there was just one thing she wished for... it was Berg’s recognition.

 

She wanted him to acknowledge how hard she was working, even for someone she resented like Sien.

 

She just wanted him to see that all of this was for his sake.

 

And maybe, through all this effort, he might show her a glimpse of the affection he once had for her.

 

Like Berg, Ner was reaching her limit.

 

Was this, too, a result of their soul-bond? Though their formal connection had been severed... perhaps their bond still lingered inside, Ner wondered.

 

There were many reasons why she was reaching her limit.

 

The physical strain, the lack of affection from Berg—it all weighed heavily on her. But, maybe the most painful thing of all was seeing Berg falter like this.

 

The fact that she might be the one causing him pain made it even harder for her to bear.

 

“...Haa.”

 

She let out a light sigh, filled with endless torment.

 

If Berg would just hold her once... no, if he would just show even the slightest sign that he still had some affection for her, it would give her the strength she needed.

 

But she knew.

 

Now wasn’t the time to ask for such things.

 

It wasn’t right to ask something like that from someone who was already struggling.

 

She couldn’t ask him to notice her suffering.

 

Because he was suffering even more.

 

In fact, right now, all Ner wanted was to comfort him.

 

She wanted him to hold on, to stay strong.

 

That’s why she was tirelessly making the medicine.

 

As the sun set, the evening sky was painted in hues of orange.

 

She had been handling herbs all day, and her fingertips were wrinkled from the sap.

 

Her entire body was soaked in the sharp, pungent scent of the herbs.

 

For someone with such a sensitive sense of smell, it was no easy task.

 

At the same time, her head continued to spin, and her eyes grew blurry.

 

No matter how hard it got, she didn’t care.

 

If someday, Berg would just accept her.

 

...No matter in what form.

 

She didn’t mind if they weren’t husband and wife.

 

Even if it was as a secret lover, she would be fine with that.

 

“...Haa.”

 

Ner rubbed her tired eyes, then heard the sound of someone entering the house.

 

Her heart raced at the heavy footsteps.

 

She opened the door, and there stood Berg, staring back at her with a hardened expression.

 

“...Berg.”

 

His face looked more exhausted than usual.

 

The whole town was in an uproar because of the Krund situation.

 

She knew that, under Gale’s guidance, preparations had begun to flee.

 

But the problem was, fleeing wasn’t as simple as it sounded.

 

Especially for the severely ill like Sien, who might not have the strength to endure such a journey.

 

Those who were struggling just to stay in bed.

 

To run away from Krund in this situation would be the same as abandoning them.

 

If you thought about it rationally, maybe abandoning them was the right choice.

 

It might save more people.

 

But morally, it didn’t feel like the right decision.

 

And she knew it wasn’t a choice Berg would make.

 

“...”

 

Berg was drenched in sweat, likely from another grueling workout.

 

She knew he used physical exertion to clear his mind whenever things got tough.

 

Ner looked at him with deep concern.

 

She wanted to be his strength.

 

“...Berg...”

 

She was about to say something, but Berg walked past her.

 

“...Sorry, Ner. Later.”

 

And with that, he quietly entered the master bedroom.

 

-Thud.

 

The door to the master bedroom closed.

 

“...”

 

Ner was left standing alone in the living room.

 

In the house they had repaired together, she now stood awkwardly, like an outsider.

 

With her head hanging low, she finally looked down at her own feet.

 

She felt utterly pathetic.

 

She had stayed up for countless nights, trying so hard just to get a sliver of attention from Berg... and yet, she couldn’t even catch his gaze.

 

The exhaustion that had settled in her body suddenly crashed over her all at once.

 

And, along with it, the emotions she had been suppressing surged up inside her.

 

“...Ugh.”

 

Like a dam cracking open, she could feel the feelings she had been holding back start to flow.

 

It was something small that triggered it, but so many things had piled up over time.

 

A few days ago, when Berg secretly told Sien... that he wanted to leave somewhere.

 

The endless rejections and denials.

 

The hand that never reached out to her, even once.

 

The lack of praise for all her sleepless efforts.

 

“...”

 

Even so, Ner held herself back one last time.

 

With a heart full of wanting to support him, she moved forward.

 

It must have been harder for Berg.

 

-Knock, knock.

 

She knocked and then entered the master bedroom.

 

The room that had once been hers as well.

 

“...Berg.”

 

Berg was sitting on the edge of the bed.

 

His head in his hands, frozen in that position.

 

Who knows how long he would’ve sat there like that if she hadn’t come to find him.

 

Ner slowly walked over to him, kneeling down in front of him so she could see his face.

 

“...”

 

“...”

 

There was a distinct atmosphere between them.

 

Even though they had divorced and so much had changed.

 

In a space shared by just the two of them, the air of their past still lingered.

 

There were emotions they could communicate without words.

 

No matter how much their relationship had changed, there was a feeling that would never disappear.

 

In that familiar atmosphere, Ner instinctively reached out and touched Berg’s face.

 

His skin felt cold.

 

“...Berg... you need to stay strong-”

 

-Thud.

 

But once again, Berg pushed her hand away.

 

“...”

 

Ner looked down at her hand, weakly pushed aside.

 

She could almost hear the sound of the thin dam she had built around her heart collapsing.

 

It was a moment of realization.

 

Ner let out a hollow, bitter laugh.

 

Even in this state, where he was struggling so much, Berg was still pushing her away.

 

Whether it was an act or his true feelings, she didn’t know... but it was enough to drain the last of her strength.

 

“...I guess I...”

 

Tears began to slowly fall from Ner’s eyes.

 

They felt colder than ever.

 

No amount of rejection she had faced in her life could compare to the pain of this one.

 

“...Am I not even allowed to comfort you?”

 

She had once been his wife, but now it seemed she couldn’t even be his supporter.

 

It felt as though she was nothing more than a burden, making things harder for him.

 

Berg covered his face with his hands.

 

‘...Please... no more...’

 

He whispered.

 

Was he telling her to stop this? Or was he begging her to stop pushing him because he couldn’t bear it anymore?

 

She didn’t know.

 

But in that moment, an overwhelming surge of emotion exploded within her broken heart.

 

Without a word, Ner stood up.

 

A life filled with rejection.

 

She no longer had any attachment to such a life.

 

Without the sunlight that Berg used to shine on her, the world had become unbearably cold.

 

If she was being rejected even now, in this situation... what could possibly change in the future?

 

She returned to her room and quietly wrote a letter.

 

And with that, Ner silently left the house.

– – – The End of The Chapter – – –

 

[TL: Join Patreon to support the translation and to read up to 5 chapters ahead of the release: https://www.patreon.com/readingpia

 

Join Our Discord for regular updates and have fun with other community members: https://discord.com/invite/SqWtJpPtm9 ]