Chapter 202: Ner’s Choice (6)

 

I carried Ner in my arms and headed home.

 

There was no way I could leave her, weakened as she was, in a building treating the plague.

 

Ner had transferred all of her vitality to Sien.

 

If she stayed in that building and somehow caught the plague… weakened as she was, she wouldn’t survive.

 

Even Burns, in full health, had suffered through it.

 

So, we all agreed to take her back to her own room.

 

Her frail body seemed as if it could shatter at any moment.

 

Even moving her was a delicate task.

 

I feared her breathing would stop at any moment, so I walked slowly, carefully.

 

I found myself focusing on the faint sound of her breath.

 

Usually, when I carried her, her tail would wrap around my waist, but now it just hung, limp, nearly brushing the ground.

 

This small difference stirred a storm of emotions within me.

 

Finally, when we reached the house, I looked back at the crowd that had followed me and gave them a nod.

 

They began to disperse one by one.

 

Without waiting for everyone to leave, I stepped inside.

 

Arwin, Sylphrien, and Lan followed me into the house.

 

Even once inside, I walked slowly.

 

Quietly, I made my way to Ner’s room.

 

—Swoosh.

 

“…”

 

I placed Ner on the bed and looked down at her.

 

Death had always been close to me, but… just like with Sien, seeing someone who was once my wife in this state was something I could never get used to.

 

Maybe it was because I never expected it.

 

With my comrades in the mercenary group, I always held the mindset that we could part at any time.

 

But with Ner, Arwin, and Sien, it was different.

 

I never imagined a sudden death would come for them.

 

—Swoosh.

 

I adjusted Ner’s arm and covered her with a blanket.

 

Letting out a sigh, I turned around.

 

Standing there was Lan, her face still showing a hint of anger.

 

It was clear she still didn’t understand Ner’s decision.

 

“I’ll take care of her.”

 

Lan spoke at the same time.

 

I understood this was her way of showing affection.

 

“…”

 

I looked down at Ner.

 

In this precarious moment, when her life could slip away at any moment, I didn’t hide my true feelings.

 

“I want to take care of her.”

 

“…”

 

Lan looked up at me.

 

“…She… is my benefactor, after all.”

 

“…”

 

After contemplating for a long moment, Lan finally nodded and turned to head to her own room.

 

Sylphrien was next.

 

She looked at Ner briefly before turning to me.

 

“I checked Sien’s condition.”

 

“…”

 

“…She hasn’t fully overcome the plague yet, but it looks like she will make it. I also confirmed that the child in her womb is healthy.”

 

Sylphrien had always used magic to monitor the state of the child.

 

She even claimed to know the gender of the child.

 

I trusted her words deeply.

 

Feeling immense relief, my heart still sank thinking of Ner’s condition behind me.

 

Sylphrien delivered her message and turned away.

 

Lastly, Arwin stood before me.

 

“…”

 

She looked at my face but said nothing.

 

And I, in return, had no words for her.

 

“I… really am happy for Sien,” she said.

 

I gave her a silent nod.

 

“Ner will pull through, right…?”

 

She asked with a hopeful tone.

 

I nodded.

 

“She’ll make it.”

 

It was a statement I forced out, perhaps more of a wish than a certainty.

 

“…”

 

Arwin stood there for a long time.

 

But I needed to focus on Ner, so I spoke to her.

 

“…Get some rest, Arwin. This must have been quite a shock in the dead of night.”

 

“…”

 

Arwin hesitated, then lifted her head.

 

Taking a deep breath, she spoke softly.

 

“…You still cared for Ner all this time, didn’t you?”

 

“…”

 

I gave her no response.

 

“…Your feelings… they never disappeared, did they?”

 

“…Go back, Arwin.”

 

“…”

 

She fell silent once more, then bowed her head.

 

And then, she turned away and left.

 

I watched the direction Arwin had gone, then quietly closed the door to the room.

 

—Thud.

 

Letting out a sigh, I glanced around the room, guided by the faint candlelight.

 

The room was more spacious than I’d expected.

 

It was quieter than I’d imagined, too.

 

Perhaps that’s why.

 

In this vast, empty room, Ner lying alone on the bed looked unbearably small and vulnerable.

 

I pulled a chair close and sat beside her.

 

“…Haa.”

 

And there I stayed, simply staring at her.

 

All the memories we’d shared began to surface.

 

Our first meeting.

 

Our first meal.

 

Our wedding ceremony.

 

The clumsy first night that didn’t go as planned.

 

The conversations we shared.

 

The rings we exchanged.

 

The late-night walks and the moments in front of the festival lights.

 

—Swoosh.

 

“…”

 

Without realizing it, I ran my hand over her hair once.

 

Gently, I placed my hand on her face.

 

All these gestures had been so familiar in the past.

 

“…Ha.”

 

I sighed again and continued to watch her quietly.

 

I didn’t even consider sleeping.

 

I was prepared to stay alert in case anything happened… so there I remained, sitting by her side.

 

.

.

.

 

Time passed, and morning arrived.

 

I rested only in brief moments with my eyes closed, and during the rest of the time, I just kept watching her.

 

Having looked at her for so long, a strange feeling settled in my heart.

 

It was as if the thought of letting her go was no longer an option for me.

 

Slow but sure, a change was brewing within.

 

Early in the morning, I handed Ner’s care over to Lan and went to meet Gale.

 

After filling him in on everything that had happened overnight, completing some paperwork, and receiving an update on Krund, I went to check on Sien.

 

Sien greeted me with a healthy glow.

 

She, who had once struggled even to eat rice porridge, now gulped it down with renewed strength.

 

Seeing her like this brought a constant, soft smile to my face.

 

And with that smile, I found myself cherishing the miracle that Ner had given me over and over again.

 

Finally, I went out with Arwin to inspect the farm and check on the progress of the crops. Then, I returned to Ner once more.

 

—Thud.

 

Taking off my coat, I approached Ner in more comfortable attire.

 

I asked Lan, who was sitting by her side.

 

“…Is there any change?”

 

“…”

 

Lan shook her head.

 

Honestly, I knew there hadn’t been any change.

 

Ner lay there exactly as she had when I left in the morning.

 

“…Go rest. I’ll take over from here.”

 

I asked Lan to let me take her place, and I sat beside Ner again.

 

“…”

 

She continued to breathe shallowly, without any movement. Watching her, I called to Arwin, who had also followed me back to the house.

 

“…Arwin?”

 

“…Yes?”

 

“…Could you ask Baran to bring a bowl of porridge?”

 

Arwin nodded at my request.

 

“…Yes.”

 

It was my responsibility to make sure Ner ate.

 

When Arwin brought the porridge, I sat on the bed and gently lifted Ner, propping her up against me.

 

I cradled her head with my arm, supporting her so that her body rested at a slight incline.

 

Then, carefully, I scooped a small portion of porridge with the spoon and gently brought it to her lips.

 

“…Ner, try to swallow.”

 

Without a word, Ner responded instinctively.

 

She coughed lightly, struggled slightly, and then, with effort, swallowed the food like one would drink water.

 

Despite the pitiful sight, I continued to feed her.

 

As she grew accustomed, she began to swallow the food more comfortably.

 

After feeding her the entire bowl of porridge, I sat there for a moment in silence.

 

I looked down at Ner, asleep as she leaned against me.

 

Without even realizing it, I gently brushed my hand over her face, murmuring softly.

 

“…Wake up now.”

 

That was the most important thing.

 

Only by waking up could she begin to recover.

 

But Ner gave no response, and so, I gently laid her back on the bed.

 

By now, she should be comfortable enough to digest the food.

 

As my skin parted from hers, a chill set in.

 

I hadn’t noticed the warmth when we were close, but now it was all too real.

 

I continued to sit beside her, waiting quietly for the moment she would open her eyes again.

 

****

 

Arwin watched over Berg through the bluebird, Lua.

 

She still couldn’t fully process Ner’s choice.

 

She never would have thought that Ner would make the decision to sacrifice herself, ready to face death.

 

And for her rival, no less.

 

Alongside this realization came a strange feeling.

 

In her self-sacrificial act, Ner resembled Berg more than anyone.

 

Whether it was jealousy… or perhaps a sense of alarm, Arwin couldn’t quite name these feelings.

 

Berg hadn’t taken his eyes off Ner for even a second.

 

“…”

 

Surely, gratitude played a role.

 

Thanks to Ner’s selfless sacrifice, Sien had recovered her strength.

 

Her action had allowed Berg to protect two members of his family.

 

Naturally, there would be gratitude.

 

But Arwin could see there was something more.

 

There were expressions Berg only showed when he was alone with Ner.

 

A look of suffering, a pained remorse. A tenderness, and a sadness.

 

Expressions that couldn’t be made without a deep emotion behind them.

 

The way he would occasionally brush her face with his hand proved it.

 

The gentle way he held her close and fed her showed the depth of his heart.

 

“…”

 

Yet, despite this, Arwin felt a growing distance from Berg.

 

She had always been prepared to wait through the passage of time, knowing that her lifespan far exceeded his, but… she was beginning to realize that the indelible marks on his life were not her own.

 

It was Sien and Ner, short-lived like him, who were shaping his story.

 

An uncontainable anxiety followed in the wake of this realization.

 

She found herself envying Ner, who lay there in Berg’s care.

 

Of course, given the sacrifices Ner had made, it was only natural… but her envy was undeniable.

 

“…Hoo.”

 

But Arwin suppressed those feelings.

 

The farm work had been progressing smoothly lately.

 

If she waited a little longer, new sprouts would start to grow.

 

And when that time came… she could ask him to accept her gift of lifespan.

 

She could suggest that he spend the next sixty years in happiness with Sien… or perhaps Ner, and then, after those years, share the centuries that followed with her.

 

To Berg, it was a gift with nothing to lose.

 

Who would welcome death?

 

How could one endure the fear of that unknown?

 

It would be easier to spend hundreds of years by her side in this world.

 

This wasn’t a gift given with strings attached or a debt to repay.

 

All Arwin needed was for him to stay by her side.

 

Just as he had cherished her in the past… if he could love her as his wife, that would be enough.

 

“…”

 

Arwin looked down at Berg.

 

She watched as he clung desperately to Ner’s hand, pressing a soft kiss to her knuckles.

 

Enduring the piercing ache once again, Arwin continued to play the role of a friend.

– – – The End of The Chapter – – –

 

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